mrbrown on the Singapore Budget 2011 aka the Year of the Carrot

This year, the finance minister, Tharman Shanmugaratnam, announced as part of the budget report, a "Growth Dividend" payout of between S$600 to S$800 (US$469 to US$625) to Singapore citizens.

That was the angpow, or red packet, that we were waiting to hear about. This is an election year when, traditionally, the ruling party dishes out these carrots to sweeten the ground before we go to the polls.

Someone remarked, "Wah, that is quite a big sum. This year gahmen using branded carrot ah?"

"Gahmen" is our warm and affectionate term for "the government."

Selective hearing and free lunches

The election year budget goodies announcement is such an important part of our lives here that it drowns out the rest of the budget stuff, such as incentives for productivity, the Workfare bonus (Workfare is our way of doing welfare without using the word welfare) and training subsidies for companies.

The ears of the average Singaporean probably only heard Tharman saying, "Wawawawa … the majority of Singaporeans will receive 600-800 Singapore dollars … wawawawa.”

Not unlike that sound you hear when adults speak in a "Peanuts" cartoon.

Sure the television and radio licence was also scrapped and many households will receive rebates on their conservancy charges, too. But Singaporeans are a pragmatic "Show me the money" lot, so S$600-S$800 was all we heard.

The finance minister took pains to emphasize that the budget, though "generous," was "not an election ploy."

To which many Singaporeans responded with a giggle and a wink.

Sure, if you say so, sir. I am being mean. Of course this budget was given out of love.

Now don't you lose your heads

Our senior minister, SM Goh Chok Tong, also encouraged us not to run out and splurge, lest we drive up the already high expected inflation.

Wow, what a buzz kill. I was going to run out and buy me a condo with that cash, man.

Still, I think most Singaporeans will keep the money aside for a rainy day.

In Singapore, there is a saying amongst the older folks: "Gahmen give you a chicken drumstick to eat today, but tomorrow, they will take back the whole chicken from you."

We still remember the elation of receiving the, ahem, Progress Package (another term for the angpow of the 2006), only to face a GST hike from 5 percent to 7 percent in the later part of the year, post-elections.

At this point, I want to stress there is absolutely NO connection between the good news before the elections then, and the bad news after. None at all!

It was all our own perception and the GST hike was absolutely and totally necessary to help the lower-income group, as the government said it was for. Because if they say it, it must be true.

But I am sure the government will understand if the psychological scars of 2006 make us a little less sure of what to do with our S$600-S$800.

Of fools and horses

Let it not be said that mrbrown looks a gift horse in the mouth. (I have been dying to use this proverb since I learned it in primary school.)

No indeed! I will look at this gift horse from the government in its entirety -- from its flaring nostrils to its generous behind. What a fine steed it is, and a worthy stallion to send our economy galloping into new frontiers!

Sure, a few of these horses might break a leg and have to be shot, but I am sure we will make it to new lands of milk and honey if we just stick together, angpows and branded carrots in hand.

I am wondering if I can convince the wife to part with her share of the gift horse, and combine it with my gift horse, so that our combined Grow Dividends can buy us a nice new Apple iPad 2.

I heard it has a better battery, as well as front- and rear-facing cameras. As we all know, front- and rear-facing cameras are absolutely necessary to ensure our financial prosperity.

At least that's the story I am selling my wife.

I assure you, my plan to use our budget handouts this way is in no way a ploy. I am buying this gadget out of my love of family and country. I am sure the wife will believe me, just like I believe the government that there is no such thing as an election-year budget.