6 ways IPL4 could get sexier

Quick -- who’s the leading run-scorer this Indian Premier League (IPL)? Ha, drew blank, did ya? Okay, another one. Simple. Who’s leading the points table? Didn’t know that either? What’s that you say? Hardly been watching the IPL? Yeah. It’s just not as engaging as previous years, is it?

Some say it’s because it came right after the World Cup. Rubbish. The real reason is the change in leadership.

The IPL was going along nicely under founding architect and erstwhile honcho Lalit Kumar Modi who pumped in extravagance after extravagance, making the tournament progressively glitzier, sexier, crazier (his own version of Olympic motto "Citius, Altius, Fortius", if you will).

And then, thanks to some remarkably swift business deals, he was replaced as chairman and commissioner by Chirayu Amin, who promptly stepped in and got rid of all the parties. Boo.

There was Amin sitting on a goldmine, and it gets turned into a cheap imitation bracelet.

So imagine Modi had stayed. In a fictional world, this is what could have been ... and hopefully these ideas will get implemented in IPL 5, before ratings plummet further, and people find amusement in a sport other than cricket (gasp).

1. Double and triple run scores

Remember Scrabble, where if you placed a Q on a Double Letter Score you’d get 20 points? This is an idea begging to be institutionalized in the IPL.

Imagine demarcated zones around the ground that multiply batsmen’s runs. Even the purists will love it.

Why should a lucky outside edge to Third Man be of equal value as a gloriously crafted cover drive?

With this calculation technique you can potentially score a century in six balls.

2. Matches at the Ambani mansion

Seriously, Mukesh, forget what Tata said. I need to ask you what’s the point in having a billion-dollar, 27-story home if you have to drive all the way to Wankhede to watch IPL games?

Here’s where some ingenuity can work -- use the three helipads, man.

The batsmen can stay on one and the bowler can use an anti-gravity pod to deliver the ball.

In the spirit of the game of gully cricket, any ball that goes out of the catchable area is automatically out.

Now that’s owner’s pride.

3. WAG vs. cheerleaders matches

Half the people who come to the stadium do so for the cheerleaders and the wives-and-girlfriends anyway.

Imagine scrapping the normal boring (royalty-type name) versus (ridiculous name) match and hosting a Cheerleaders versus WAG game instead.

Who doesn’t want to see Deepika Padukone bowl a beamer at one of them Royal Challengers Bangalore blondes?

If the ladies think that’s sexist, I apologize. There can also be a team owners versus annoying host contest.

4. Microphones for all

Cricketers have never been the most polite lot, but all this catching-what-they’re-saying-by-reading-lips is so 20^th century.

We will only ever evolve as a race when we can let everyone know what we truly think of the other.

Harbhajan Singh went one step towards attaining this sort of nirvana, as we know, but we should do more.

So, on-field microphones for everyone. So the entire stadium can hear exactly what the batsman and bowler are saying in mid-pitch. It’s likely to be about which stocks are likely to fluctuate on the morrow, but then, it could be something more colorful too.

Only one way to find out.

5. SMS polls for tough calls

Taking Modi’s vision of making this 'the people’s game' a step further, let all the contentious decisions (run-outs, nicks, caught properly or not) be made via audience voting.

A number will show up on screen during such moments and viewers all over the country will have to SMS IPLYES or IPLNO, to decide the players’ fate.

Alternately, there could be a panel of expert judges too, like "American Idol". But then again anything that runs the risk of giving Navjot Sidhu more airtime should be quickly nipped in the bud.

6. Two bowlers from opposite ends

Isn’t the T20 format all about saving time? Isn't it about innovation in sports?

This would be the baap of all innovations: get bowlers to deliver simultaneously from both ends.

Imagine the fun. Two shots for fielders to look out for (they’ll become more alert), one innings lasting only 10 traditional overs (hence saving time and boosting productivity of the nation) and a glorious gamut of emotions as one batsman scores a century and the other is dismissed off the same "delivery".

Plus, Ravi Shastri will probably be too confused to comment and that’s always a plus.